Wednesday, November 14, 2007

M is for Meditation

I'm a bit keen on all things based on middle eastern philosophies. Love yoga(I can stand on my head--showing off, I know), briefly subscribed to feng shui (I'm still looking for my wealth corner) and have given tai chi a whirl, but never meditation. EGG on the other hand subscribes to the philosophy of scotch and tv.
I'll just go to sleep he said when I told he what we were doing--he'd had a long week. Well he was in for a surprise wasn't he!

I had a few pre-conceived ideas about meditation--all wrong as it turns out. What do you think of when you think of meditation? Dimmed lighting, a lot of people sitting cross-legged saying ommm, a sense of serenity?

Well we must have gone to a different meditation because this one was in a concrete hall, smack in the middle of one of Brisbane's busiest suburbs. There was Indian music, rows of plastic chairs, a photo of an Indian woman with a huge bindi and a TV. What's this TV all about, I thought, don't they eschew the technological values of our consumer-driven society?

So we sat on the orange plastic chairs and waited to meditate. We waited a while because a man, who looked more like Barry from the hardware shop than a spiritual leader, welcomed us and started his spiel all the while staring directly at EGG who squirmed in his chair. Barry (let's call him that because he didn't introduce himself--perhaps politeness is not spiritual) must have thought EGG needed some special guidance because he didn't let EGG out of his sight range for the whole patter which must have lasted for at least 10 minutes.

Barry finished up with a pointed stare at EGG, who by this time was eying off the open door in hopes of a speedy escape. But then Mike, the computer programmer, well he looked like one and he didn't introduce himself either, got us started on meditation.

We had to close our eyes and hold our hand on various parts of our bodies while silently chanting to mother (whoever she was). The chants were so long and complicated that I forgot how they went and I started getting stressed --I don't think I'm very good at meditation. But finally I got into the swing of it, focussing on my thoughts all the while ignoring the police chase and car alarm that drifted in through the open door, when bang--it was over.

You may think time flew but no, we only got to meditate for five minute because we had to watch a video of the Indian lady who kept talking about Asmet. I later found out that she was talking about asthma, that's how much sense it made.

I tried to catch EGG's eye but he wouldn't look at me. Surely he didn't think I was trying to make him laugh. But then, bonus, it was time to meditate again and then Mike muttered something about workshops.

So we meditated happily until Mike walked up behind EGG and asked him what he could feel. Ummm, I've got tingling in my hands he said. Big liar, he felt nothing, he just said that so that Mike would leave him alone, I know him too well. But this is the good bit, Mike decided to workshop him. By this time I couldn't help myself so I peered throught half open eyes and looked at the shadow (should've been a spy). Mike was standing behind EGG flicking his wrists, making circles above his head and clicking his fingers like a puppet on broken strings for oh about, TEN minutes. EGG is so lucky. His aura must be as clean as whistle.

Then it was time to wake up. Mike and Barry asked us to stay back and discuss our experiences, but, by this time, EGG had hold of my hand and was dragging me to the door.

Do you think EGG might like to make this meditation a weekly thing?

M is for meditation---oommmm!